You have the power to increase your self-esteem — no one can do it for you. If you want to increase your self-esteem, change your daily habits. If you have a ‘monkey mind’ that constantly puts you down, dissolve it once and for all. Negative self talk lowers your self-esteem. Associating with people who constantly complain and whine about life drains your energy and lowers your self-esteem — limit the time you spend with them. To quote Best-Selling Author Sonia Choquette, “Misery loves company, but happiness stands alone.”
7 Habits That Lower Your Self Esteem
1. Negative self talk. Are you constantly criticizing yourself? Do you put yourself down? If you do, it’s no wonder you have low self-esteem. No one is perfect. Stop the negative self talk and you’ll increase your self-esteem. Say affirmations such as, “I am beautiful; I am loving and lovable; I matter; I love and accept myself; I love and approve of myself.” Get a hand mirror and say these affirmations every day. Look directly into your eyes and say the affirmations with great feeling. Also, compliment yourself. If you do something good, congratulate yourself. Say, “Great job on writing that article” or “Kudos to you for shoveling your neighbor’s driveway.”
Stop the negative self talk and compliment yourself to ‘shift’ your energy and increase your self-esteem.
2. Associating with negative people. Associating with negative people can suck the life out of you and lower your self-esteem. Why would you have high self-esteem if you hang around with people who complain and whine all of the time? Lower energies aren’t good for your mental, emotional, and physical health. The next time you’re with negative people, really listen to their words and feel their vibration. You may feel your jaw and stomach tighten. This will affect your self-esteem. You’ll feel depleted and won’t have a zest for life. Detach from these people and thank them for the lessons they’ve given you.
3. Associating with negative people. They reflect back to you what you’re creating in your life. Thank these people for the lessons they provided, bless and release them.
4. Seclusion. When was the last time you enjoyed a night out? If you’re anti-social, it can lower your self-esteem. Perhaps you believe you don’t deserve to have friends or fun. Where do these beliefs come from? Are they true? Being secluded is no way to live. Take baby steps to meet people. Attend a church service or volunteer for at your favorite charitable organization. It will increase your self-esteem.
5. Watching depressing movies and television shows. Mind what you watch. Believe it or not, you could be influenced by movies and television shows. If you constantly watch the news or shows that are violent or filled with grief, it could lower your self-esteem. It can become depressing to watch news shows that only report the bad in the world. What about the good? Believe it or not, there is good in the world.
Monitor how much news you watch. Instead of watching depressing movies or television shows, watch comedies. Laughter is the best medicine!
6. Looking at the glass as half empty. Look at the glass as half full. Life is filled with ups and downs. It’s a great way to see how you handle situations. If life wasn’t filled with challenges, how would you grow? You would stay stuck and wouldn’t move forward in life. That’s no way to live.
7. A poor attitude. A poor mindset produces a poor life. If you don’t believe this, look at the balance in your checking and savings account. Are they at the maximum of $250,000 FDIC insured? Or, are they $100, $20 or $5?
If the above habits resonate with you, make a decision to acquire new ones. It takes 30-days to change a habit. Are you ready for the challenge? Your life will change in ways you may not expect. Does this scare you? Change can be good but you won’t know unless you get rid of your old habits and replace them with new ones. What are you waiting for? You have the power to increase your self-esteem. There’s no better time than to start than the present!
Amandah T. Blackwell
It’s me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence.
~Paula Cole, “Me,” This Fire
- Watch Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits (leadershipforlife.wordpress.com)